Left Behind
by whytewytch
Summary: In "Conversion", Major Lorne led the 1st trip to the planet to get the stem cells that would keep his CO from turning into a bug. Why wasn't he with the rest of the team on the 2nd op? Rated teen for adult concepts.


**A/N: This is a missing scene from "Conversion". I may wind up writing more of these. There were many times when it seemed like Lorne should have been somewhere when he was not.**

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><p>Major Evan Lorne knocked on the door to Doctor Elizabeth Weir's office. Weir had asked Evan to her office to discuss their current situation: that situation was that the military head of Atlantis was turning into a bug and the commander of the Daedelus had set himself up as replacement. There was some political jockeying you never expected when you were in basic. <em>Yeah, I'm in the middle of a power struggle in a galaxy far, far away because my CO is mutating like some bad version of<em> The Fly. Like there was a good version when it came to mutating.

Evan closed his eyes briefly as he thought of Stevens and Walker. It didn't matter that he'd had no choice or that he'd saved them from a fate worse than death. The truth was, he'd killed two of his men and that pain would stay with him until the day he died. The door opened and he quickly arranged his game face, knowing that Dr. Weir would still be feeling the sting of having given the okay to the mission that had cost the two men their lives. She worried over the citizens of Atlantis base as though they were her children and Evan didn't want to add to her anxiety.

He strode in and sat in one of the chairs before her desk. Doctor Weir stared at him, her green eyes pinning him to the seat. The lines around her eyes and the dark circles under them spoke to Evan of how little sleep the director of Atlantis had gotten recently. Her pinched nose and the lines around her mouth told him of the stress that was the cause of her sleeplessness.

Evan had only been in Atlantis for a few months, but in that short time, he had come to respect Atlantis' co-commanders. Elizabeth Weir was one of the strongest non-military leaders it had been his pleasure to serve under and John Sheppard was nothing like Evan had been warned. Sure, the colonel was arrogant, but he had good reason to be, and if disobeying orders in order to leave no man behind was a fault, then Evan seriously thought his military leaders needed to re-think their value systems.

"Dr. Weir." Evan stared across the desk at Weir. He knew that she and Colonel Sheppard had been through a lot together and that she cared for him. The admiration those two shared was obvious.

"Major Lorne. How are you?"

He could hear it, unspoken but there.

_How are you handling the loss of your men? What could I have done to prevent it?_

"I'm fine, Ma'am."

_There was nothing anyone could've done to prevent it, except to sacrifice Colonel Sheppard. And I'll handle it because I have to, because they're not the last men who will die under my command._

"Any news on Colonel Sheppard?"

"His condition continues to…worsen." She wrung her hands, then linked her fingers and put her hands on the desk between them. "Major…Dr. Beckett believes there may be another way."

"I thought the stem cells from the eggs were the only things that could save the Colonel."

"They are. Carson seems to think that we sent the wrong people, or rather person, into the cave."

Evan couldn't believe his ears. He rarely got a dressing down and this one seemed uncalled for. He tried to keep the sting from his voice. "I don't understand, Ma'am. Walker and Stevens were two of our best men. Ronon and Teyla are beyond amazing. And, frankly, I don't think Stargate Command would've chosen me as Sheppard's XO if I wasn't up to the task."

Weir's eyes widened. "Oh! No! No, Major. I certainly didn't mean to imply… Beckett simply meant that the man who shares some genetic traits with these creatures might stand a better chance to get near the eggs."

Evan blushed and dipped his head, embarrassed by his defensiveness. He was all military though and recovered quickly. "I'll get another team together to act as escort."

"No."

"I'm sorry, Ma'am. You're losing me again."

"I want you to stay here, Major. I don't want to risk any more people than I have to. Sheppard and his team, along with Carson, will be the only ones to go to the planet."

"Ma'am, with all due respect, as Sheppard's XO, I should be there."

"That's exactly why I don't want you there, Major. If something happens to you and the stem cells are unable to be retrieved, I'll be stuck with Colonel Caldwell indefinitely." Weir smiled, trying to soften the blow of keeping him out of harm's way.

Evan smiled despite the disappointment and helplessness that washed over him in waves. "Yes, Ma'am. Am I dismissed?"

"You are, Major."

Evan rose and headed for the door. He stopped in the doorway and turned back. "Ma'am."

"Yes, Major."

"Tell Colonel Sheppard to come back, please. I don't want to be Colonel Caldwell's XO."

"I will, Major."


End file.
